It's been a long time since I had a blog. Changes in living arrangements, upheavals in personal relationships and financial stress all seemed more important than logging on regularly to tell the world what was going on with me. So I gave up.
And yet I am reminded today how telling the world (read : friends, students, shopkeepers) my problems, sharing my successes, confiding my fears bring to my mind a clarity that would otherwise take me days (and even, months) to acquire. And so theBibik returns.
Most days I'm staring down the world, defending my position, asserting my worth. Everything else floating by in a blur. But recently I dared steal a furtive glance around and saw people who love me. It made me want to look around more often. If only to be reminded that I matter to people.
This week I learnt that being meaningful to someone doesn't mean you have to be on your best behaviour all the time. It doesn't mean you need to live up to that person's expectations (or what you THINK that person's expectations of you are.) All it means is that you're allowed to trust in the relationship that makes you BOTH meaningful to each other. And that means, if you need to say "hey you, why are you being so xiao jie?" that you'll say it.
love it! this is something..it's like you've written my own thoughts too. and it's as neat as a pin. write more! ~_^
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